You know, Florida really isn't that far. It could be worse. I could really be going to a place requiring much more thought/effort/money to return from for visits, i.e., nourishment of the soul. I could be going someplace cold.
I have the trip down to a science at this point, and with the clothes and items I'm leaving behind it enables my packing requirements to drop from the incredible "it goes in a carryon or it doesn't go" to "have ID, boarding pass and crochet hook, will travel". I think complete time from door to door is 4-5hours. Completely doable for a weekend.
It is still tough to leave everyone. Sure, that's a given...an obvious statement that everyone would knowingly agree to with a slight head cock and "aww" look in their eyes. But when you really have to do it, leave everyone, you begin to realize how many people are really in your life day to day that you enjoyed or, at least, who brought some simple pleasure to you.
My kids, family and long time friends make the top of the list with little thought. But when they arrange their schedule to spend time with me repeatedly over several days before I go, I realize it's much like trying to fill up at a buffet. I want it all, but you can only have so much, and it still won't be enough. And worse, while they are with you it can seem so "filling", so gratifying and normal that you can wallow in the enjoyment of it as if it won't end. How do you actually look in their eyes one last time and get one final hug. How do you turn away and not know when you will feel the blessed energy of their presence that you now grasp is a part of what living your life is all about.
There are so many people - neighbors, colleagues, gym buddies, book club members, friends of friends and relatives through marriage - who have been mined over the years like nuggets of gold. You realize you've mustered a stockpile of happiness, humor, encouragement, sympathy, care and love from them, and you sink a little at the thought of having to start that all over somewhere else. You worry that you won't be able to duplicate it. Ever.
But duplicating it isn't exactly what I should set out to do, is it? The thing about friendship in any form, be it long or short term or even in passing, is that each connection is individual and significant on its own, not to be replaced and is always with you like a distinct taste you can conjur and enjoy in the very moment it floods back to you.
Friends aren't replaced, and their absence doesn't make them less touching to your soul. Thinking of all the people I encounter who in some way make me smile at heart and thinking of how I will miss them makes me realize how teeming my life is with goodness. I choose to not let that go just because it's not within my proximity.
Friendship doesn't diminish, and love has no edges, no thresholds. Life opens you up and offers a place for more.
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